Peeling Off Another Layer
So, my prayer this evening is that I will continue to let the walls crumble, that I will continue to let God heal me, as painful as it may be.
Some random and not so random thoughts.
I recently read a book titled “In Search of the Proverbs 31 Man” by Michelle McKinney Hammond. What drew me to this book initially was of course Proverbs 31. There are lots of books that deal with how to be a Proverbs 31 woman, but what about the man mentioned in Proverbs 31, there is really nothing about him. What type of man deserves a Proverbs 31 woman? Since my goal is to be a Proverbs 31 woman I thought I should start looking at what type of man I need to lead me.
The first thing I want to say about the book it…read it! Whether you are married or single, female or male, I really think you will get something out of it. I highly recommend it. The second thing I want to say is, this is going to be a long summary, keep reading at your own risk.
I came up with 18 main points to a Proverbs 31 man. Here they are.
1) He makes wise decisions
- Only a man who is able to seek the rich counsel of the Lord for insight can lead his loved ones wisely.
2) He bears the consequences of his mistakes
- His spirit is not crushed by adversity, and he doesn’t blame others for his problems. He simply takes responsibility and finds a solution.
3) A praying man is a powerful man.
- Only through prayer will a man fully know how to meet his wife’s needs.
4) He has a vision for his life and a secure sense of purpose and destiny.
- He has a great sense of well-being because he feels fulfilled in his own work and accomplishments.
5) He has the heart of a servant
- True leadership requires a man to develop the heart of a servant.
6) He is able to face his weaknesses and not allow pride to keep him from seeking the help he needs.
- In the course of a man’s attaining his purpose, there is a time when a woman must be willing to fight with her man.
- There are some things that a woman can do that a man can’t and vice versa.
7) He is secure in his manhood.
- He is not intimidated by a woman’s strength because he is aware of his own strength.
- He considers the woman in his life to be an equal but unique partner.
8) He is able to prioritize the issues in his life and deal with them accordingly.
- He knows the perfect order of his life: his relationship with God first, his family second, work and career third.
- The wife is the #1 priority after God.
- He takes care of business at home first.
9) He is honest in his commitments and devotes himself wholeheartedly to them.
- He will stick to his assignment not matter what.
- He garners the trust of his wife and family and the respect of the community because he follows through with his commitments.
10) He clears the path and leads his wife on the course of righteousness.
- The married man must strengthen his covenant with his wife to keep himself accountable to her by praying together, worshiping together, believing together, and remaining transparent in his struggles.
- A single Proverbs 31 man is honest about his intentions toward a potential wife and is steadfast in godly conduct.
11) He assumes the responsibility for covering his wife.
- He does not wait for her to proclaim her need, he is aware of it, he is drawn to them with a committed heart to fulfill those needs and he takes responsibility for shielding her from all she is vulnerable to in her uncovered state.
- He takes the responsibility of caring for her needs, protecting her, and ensuring her overall well-being, spiritually, emotionally, and physically.
12) He recognizes the needs of his wife as an opportunity to bless her.
- The man receives his covering from God and then he extends it to his wife.
13) He realizes that his word equals his life and makes the sacrifice needed to honor his vows.
- He perseveres through the hard times, finds a way to work things out, and sticks with the plan until he and his wife make it through the storm.
- It is a sin to make a promise and then break it.
14) He considers the cost of a commitment to the woman in his life and pays it.
15) He knows how to romance his woman.
- He knows how to make her feel special and courts her before and after marriage.
- He shares his heart and feelings with her.
16) He views the love he shares with his wife as a sacred gift to give and receive.
17) He embodies the nature of Christ.
18) He lives a life of unconditional love.
Now, all those points being stated, I am not so naïve as to think that a single man (other than Christ) will embody all of these qualities all of the time. And I believe that a wife is to help her husband in these areas, help him by loving him and supporting him. There’s so much more that I could write but there’s just not enough time.
That being said, there is another post on the way. I’ve been formulating it for awhile, but I want to do a bit more research before I post.
I wish I knew the exact reason why sometimes. I have the general idea of why, there are some theories floating around out there, but not the specific reason. It seems like if it’s not me then it’s happening really close to me, either an immediate family member or friend.
I’ve been hurt, I’m confused, and I want it all to stop. I keep asking God, “Why? Why are you letting this happen?”…I’m still waiting for a response. It seems like something gets taken care of and three more pop up in place of the one that was taken care of.
I wrote this last night but I still wanted to post it.
Let me share with you my wonderfully craptastic day.
My day began at 6:30 in the morning. My step-dad was on the way to hospital with a ruptured bowel and my mom needed my help to get her room ready for a sub. So, I got up, threw on some clothes, and headed out the door to a middle school in
I got home about 3pm, did some stuff around the house, took a shower, and left to meet a friend (Justin) to go see the Riverside Concert Band perform. About 6pm I called my mom to see what was up with my step-dad. They finally had him admitted and in a room. Come to find out the doctor that was in the room for 2 minutes had signed admittance papers but never came back to tell us, they were apparently searching for a room. The ONLY reason they found out he was admitted was because they called the insurance company…THE INSURANCE COMPANY!!!! A surgeon still had not been in to see him. After much haggling of the ER staff it was discovered that they intended to keep him over the weekend to see how he was doing, so he might not see a surgeon until Sunday or Monday. All of this by 6:30 in the evening. At this point, I’ve been up for 12 hours.
After the bands performance we went over to another friends house (Meagan) to hang out, have a couple of drinks and chill. All is fine, we’re chatting, laughing at one another, you know the typical stuff friends do. I have to use the restroom, a natural enough occurrence after an intake of fluids. Well, I forgot I had my cell phone in my back pocket. It fell in the toilet. There was nothing in the toilet, but I washed it off anyway. So now, my cell phone has the battery off, drying out so it will hopefully work again. Good times thus far. Well, around comes 1 in the morning or so. Justin and I decide we should probably take off, so we hug Meagan goodbye and head off. We’re driving back to his place (that’s where my truck is) chatting and talking about the events of the day, including my stupid cell phone mishap, and we finally get back to his place. I take my stuff out of his car, place it on the passenger side of my truck and walk around to the drivers side. Lo and behold, my truck had been egged at some point during the evening. By 2am it was dried, some parts even looked cooked. There was nothing I could do at Justin’s so I drove home. Once I got home I found a bucket and rag, poured some soap into the bucket, pulled out the hose, and washed my truck…at 2:30 in the morning.
So, here it is 3:30 in the morning. I’ve been up for 21 hours thus far. I’m typing this blog in Word because the internet is down right now. I guess I’ll try getting online after a few hours of sleep. All I can do is laugh. Because if I don’t laugh I’m going to burst into tears.
Oh, and my phone is now working! Yea!