The Proverbs 31 Man

I recently read a book titled “In Search of the Proverbs 31 Man” by Michelle McKinney Hammond. What drew me to this book initially was of course Proverbs 31. There are lots of books that deal with how to be a Proverbs 31 woman, but what about the man mentioned in Proverbs 31, there is really nothing about him. What type of man deserves a Proverbs 31 woman? Since my goal is to be a Proverbs 31 woman I thought I should start looking at what type of man I need to lead me.

The first thing I want to say about the book it…read it! Whether you are married or single, female or male, I really think you will get something out of it. I highly recommend it. The second thing I want to say is, this is going to be a long summary, keep reading at your own risk.

I came up with 18 main points to a Proverbs 31 man. Here they are.

1) He makes wise decisions
- Only a man who is able to seek the rich counsel of the Lord for insight can lead his loved ones wisely.

2) He bears the consequences of his mistakes
- His spirit is not crushed by adversity, and he doesn’t blame others for his problems. He simply takes responsibility and finds a solution.

3) A praying man is a powerful man.
- Only through prayer will a man fully know how to meet his wife’s needs.

4) He has a vision for his life and a secure sense of purpose and destiny.
- He has a great sense of well-being because he feels fulfilled in his own work and accomplishments.

5) He has the heart of a servant
- True leadership requires a man to develop the heart of a servant.

6) He is able to face his weaknesses and not allow pride to keep him from seeking the help he needs.
- In the course of a man’s attaining his purpose, there is a time when a woman must be willing to fight with her man.
- There are some things that a woman can do that a man can’t and vice versa.

7) He is secure in his manhood.
- He is not intimidated by a woman’s strength because he is aware of his own strength.
- He considers the woman in his life to be an equal but unique partner.

8) He is able to prioritize the issues in his life and deal with them accordingly.
- He knows the perfect order of his life: his relationship with God first, his family second, work and career third.
- The wife is the #1 priority after God.
- He takes care of business at home first.

9) He is honest in his commitments and devotes himself wholeheartedly to them.
- He will stick to his assignment not matter what.
- He garners the trust of his wife and family and the respect of the community because he follows through with his commitments.

10) He clears the path and leads his wife on the course of righteousness.
- The married man must strengthen his covenant with his wife to keep himself accountable to her by praying together, worshiping together, believing together, and remaining transparent in his struggles.
- A single Proverbs 31 man is honest about his intentions toward a potential wife and is steadfast in godly conduct.

11) He assumes the responsibility for covering his wife.
- He does not wait for her to proclaim her need, he is aware of it, he is drawn to them with a committed heart to fulfill those needs and he takes responsibility for shielding her from all she is vulnerable to in her uncovered state.
- He takes the responsibility of caring for her needs, protecting her, and ensuring her overall well-being, spiritually, emotionally, and physically.

12) He recognizes the needs of his wife as an opportunity to bless her.
- The man receives his covering from God and then he extends it to his wife.

13) He realizes that his word equals his life and makes the sacrifice needed to honor his vows.
- He perseveres through the hard times, finds a way to work things out, and sticks with the plan until he and his wife make it through the storm.
- It is a sin to make a promise and then break it.

14) He considers the cost of a commitment to the woman in his life and pays it.

15) He knows how to romance his woman.
- He knows how to make her feel special and courts her before and after marriage.
- He shares his heart and feelings with her.

16) He views the love he shares with his wife as a sacred gift to give and receive.

17) He embodies the nature of Christ.

18) He lives a life of unconditional love.

Now, all those points being stated, I am not so naïve as to think that a single man (other than Christ) will embody all of these qualities all of the time. And I believe that a wife is to help her husband in these areas, help him by loving him and supporting him. There’s so much more that I could write but there’s just not enough time.

That being said, there is another post on the way. I’ve been formulating it for awhile, but I want to do a bit more research before I post.

My Indiana Adventure

For those of you who were unaware, I took a REAL vacation this year. I went to visit my friend Danny, who lives in Indiana. I left on Wednesday July 23rd and came home on Monday July 28th. What follows is a true story, nothing has been made up. The names have not been changed to protect the innocent.

So, July 23rd rolls around and I get up at 1:30 in the morning to leave by 3am so I can get to the airport by 5am. It's a weekday morning and I'm going into Orange County so I'm not sure what traffic will be like. My mom was gracious enough to say that she would take me to the airport, for which I was very grateful. We ended up leaving a little bit after 3, which was fine because there wasn't much traffic and I got to the airport around 4:30. The ticket counter wasn't open yet, so I waited around until a little after 5 when the people got there and got myself checked in and headed up to the gate my plane was taking off from. My flight got there on time and we even took off on time. I had a 30 minute layover in Houston so I figured I would have enough time when we landed to run to the restroom and then catch my plane. Well, the pilot must have decided to slow down a bit because when the plane landed in Houston I only had 10 minutes to get to my connection. So, I finally get off the plane and run the entire terminal (because of course my connection flight is on the opposite side of the terminal) and make it to the gate with like a minute to spare only to notice that the flight has been delayed 30 minutes. Ok, not too terrible, I got a nice little run in and now I can relax until flight time. Well 1:30 rolls around (the new time we're supposed to take off) and there's an announcement that the plane is delayed until 2. Slightly annoying, but ok, they're fixing something on the plane. Two o'clock rolls around and an announcement is made that the flight is delayed until 3. Three o'clock rolls around and the flight is delayed until 4. Four o'clock rolls around (at this point I should have been in Indiana) and the flight is delayed until 5. Five o'clock rolls around and the flight is delayed until 5:30. 5:30 rolls around and the flight is canceled. They then announce that there is only one other flight into Indianapolis that evening and there are only 30 spots on the plane (our flight was full). Needless to say, there was a mad rush to the ticket counter. I was no where near the ticket counter so I didn't even try to make it in line. As I was standing in line I remembered that Danny lives relatively near to Chicago, so I gave him a call and we decided I should just fly into Chicago and he would pick me up from there. So, I finally get to the front of the line, they switch me to a flight into Chicago O'Hare airport. My bags are still going to go to Indianapolis because they're on the plane that is sitting at the airport waiting to get fixed. They tell me that they'll deliver them to Danny's place. I give them Danny's address (because who knows what hotel room I'll be in when I get there) and a description of my bag. I get on my flight to Chicago and finally land a little after 11pm. Danny was there waiting for me so we headed out to his car and started the drive home. By the time we got to his car and started driving it was about midnight (that's 9pm CA time). So, we're driving along (it's about a 2 hour drive from Chicago to Lafayette, the town he lives in) and I look at the radio clock and notice it says 2:30. I don't think too much of it because he has been driving a little slow so I figure it's going to take a little bit longer. A few minutes later I notice a sign go by on the side of the freeway. It says "Welcome to Michigan". Michigan!!!! Danny has obviously missed a turn somewhere. So, he pulls off the freeway into a little rest stop. I get on the phone and call my friend Justin. At this point it's almost midnight in CA, I know he'll be awake and able to get online and look up some maps for me. After a couple of minutes Justin tells me where the wrong turn occurred (we missed the offramp for the 65A) and what we need to do to get back on the right track (turn around and take the 65). So, we turn the car around and head back the way we came. Well, we get a few miles from the 65 and there's a sign on the side of the road announcing that the 65 is closed. I get back on the phone and call Justin again. He does some more looking at maps online and gives me directions for how to take side streets to get around the intersection and back onto the 65. The 65 is the ONLY freeway into Lafayette, so we kinda have to take it. Well, we do our little detour and finally get onto the 65. We get to Lafayette and have to stop by a Walmart. Most of the stuff I need is in my carry-on, however the stuff for my contacts was in my checked bag (more than 3oz of fluid) so I needed stuff for my contacts. We finish up at Walmart and finally get to the hotel and get me checked in. At this point it is 5am (2am CA time), I had been up for 24 hours straight. Needless to say I pretty much fell into bed.

So, here are some pictures for you to look at. After the pictures I'll talk about my trip home.

Justin put this together for me after my wonderful first day of travel.

This is Danny and I.

I really liked the way the sky looked, so I took a picture.

Some random field of flowers.

We picked blueberries.

I made a blueberry pie. It was delicious.

This was at Purdue University.
I thought the metal work around the window was cool.

Some arches at Purdue.

They had little faces carved into buildings.
This one was the funniest.

Windows of one of the Purdue buildings.

An older house in downtown Lafayette.
They had a whole area of houses that were all over 100 years old.

A gate at one of the houses.

Another old house.

I of course had to go to a Borders.
This one is historically protected property.

Entrance to the "south side" of the store.

Entrance to the "north side".

The 2nd floor.

On Monday, since I was flying out of Indianapolis, we decided to walk around the city in the morning/early afternoon before my flight.

This monument sits in the center of the city.
It is a memorial to Indiana residents that have fought in early wars.

This was the top of the monument.

They had fountains surrounding the monument with these buffalo fountains.

This was some of the metal work towards the top of the monument.

Some of the stonework surrounding the monument, and one of the waterfalls.

A closer view of one of the sides of the monument.

A closer view of another side.

This was one of the lamps that surround the monument.

This church was across the street from the monument.
I thought it looked cool.

Ok, so we were in Indianapolis. My flight was at 6:40 so I wanted to be at the airport by 5 so I could get my bag checked and not feel rushed before the plane got there. Danny tells me it only takes 20 minutes to get to the airport so we'll leave by 4:30. Well, 4 rolls around and I'm not feeling totally confident about it only taking 20 minutes to get to the airport, so I tell Danny it's time to start heading out. By the time we got back to the car and Danny found his way to the freeway (remember, he lives in Indiana) it was almost 5. As we're driving a see that the 465 is coming up. I ask Danny if he's going to take it (on the way in I had seen a sign saying the airport was off the 465) since he's quite a few lanes over. After a moment of debating, he remembers that he needs to take the 465. At this point it's 5, I wanted to be at the airport by now. So, we start driving on the 465. 30 minutes later, Danny informs me that we went the wrong way on the 465 but not to worry because it wraps around Indianapolis. I text Justin to make sure that Danny was right in his announcement. A few minutes later Justin calls me to see what's up. I explain the situation and he tells me that, by this time, it faster to just keep going on the 465 to get to the airport. We finally get to the area where the airport is and Danny takes the wrong exit, turns around to get back on the freeway, almost got on the wrong freeway, finally got back onto the right freeway and takes the correct exit. He pulls up to the front of the airport, I grab my bags out of the car, and rush inside (it's 6:05 at this point). There's a bit of a line so I wait in line and finally get up to the counter. They can't find my ticket reservation. I show them my itinerary and my receipt for payment. The guy asks if I had some trouble with my flights on the way out. I explain what happened on the way out and how they exchanged my ticket that was from Houston to Indianapolis to a ticket from Houston to Chicago. Aparantly, what the airline did was exchange not only my ticket from Houston to Indianapolis, but also my two tickets for my flight home. I flew out on Continental, but was flying home on United so I didn't even think that they could do that and didn't think to double check that. So, the United in Indianapolis had to call the United in Houston so the United in Houston could contact the Continental in Houston to get the exchange number and the confirmation number for the exchange ticket so that the United in Indianapolis could reverse the 3 ticket exchange and free up my 2 tickets so I could get home. They finally get it all straighted out at 6:35. Luckily, security was right around the corner from the ticket counter (security had to run my carry-on bag twice) and my gate was incredibly close to security. So, I made it to the gate at 6:40, only to find that my flight had been delayed. Luckily it wasn't too much, only 10 or 15 minutes. My layover this time was in Chicago. I was supposed to have an hour layover, but since the plane was running late, I only had about 30 minutes. Which is fine, no big deal. We actually board on time in Chicago and start our trip to the runway. There were tons of planes in line to take off. I saw 7planes take off. After I saw the 7th plane take off I figured it was almost time for our plane to actually leave the runway and then our plane got out of the line of planes waiting to take off and pulled over to a little side area. The captain came over the intercom and made an announcement that there was a slight electrical problem and we would have to wait until they fixed it. All I could think was, "Oh no, not again!" But, it was an easy fix apparrantly because about 30 minutes later the captain was back on the intercom letting us know he was signing paperwork and we would be on our way. So, we finally get in the air and start flying. About 30 minutes into the flight the captain tells us he would like us to stay seated with our seat belts on because we're flying next to an electrical storm. What the captain failed to tell us, until we were landing in Orange County anyway, is that to avoid flying through the electrical storm from Chicago we flew down to Oklahoma, through Texas, and them back up to Orange County.

Needless to say I was VERY happy when we landed. And even more excited when I saw that my luggage made it as well. So, this whole experience has made me realize three things. One, I will never again get in a car that Danny is driving. Two, I never want to go to Indiana again. Three, I will not fly for a very, very long time.

Life Sucks Sometimes.

I wish I knew the exact reason why sometimes. I have the general idea of why, there are some theories floating around out there, but not the specific reason. It seems like if it’s not me then it’s happening really close to me, either an immediate family member or friend.

I’ve been hurt, I’m confused, and I want it all to stop. I keep asking God, “Why? Why are you letting this happen?”…I’m still waiting for a response. It seems like something gets taken care of and three more pop up in place of the one that was taken care of.

I do have pictures (not a lot, but some) from my trip to Indiana. My trip deserves at least 1 blog if not more. I just have been so busy trying to get stuff finished up for Sunday (Camp Day!!!!). Now it’s over and I will hopefully have time to get stuff done.