The Proverbs 31 Man

I recently read a book titled “In Search of the Proverbs 31 Man” by Michelle McKinney Hammond. What drew me to this book initially was of course Proverbs 31. There are lots of books that deal with how to be a Proverbs 31 woman, but what about the man mentioned in Proverbs 31, there is really nothing about him. What type of man deserves a Proverbs 31 woman? Since my goal is to be a Proverbs 31 woman I thought I should start looking at what type of man I need to lead me.

The first thing I want to say about the book it…read it! Whether you are married or single, female or male, I really think you will get something out of it. I highly recommend it. The second thing I want to say is, this is going to be a long summary, keep reading at your own risk.

I came up with 18 main points to a Proverbs 31 man. Here they are.

1) He makes wise decisions
- Only a man who is able to seek the rich counsel of the Lord for insight can lead his loved ones wisely.

2) He bears the consequences of his mistakes
- His spirit is not crushed by adversity, and he doesn’t blame others for his problems. He simply takes responsibility and finds a solution.

3) A praying man is a powerful man.
- Only through prayer will a man fully know how to meet his wife’s needs.

4) He has a vision for his life and a secure sense of purpose and destiny.
- He has a great sense of well-being because he feels fulfilled in his own work and accomplishments.

5) He has the heart of a servant
- True leadership requires a man to develop the heart of a servant.

6) He is able to face his weaknesses and not allow pride to keep him from seeking the help he needs.
- In the course of a man’s attaining his purpose, there is a time when a woman must be willing to fight with her man.
- There are some things that a woman can do that a man can’t and vice versa.

7) He is secure in his manhood.
- He is not intimidated by a woman’s strength because he is aware of his own strength.
- He considers the woman in his life to be an equal but unique partner.

8) He is able to prioritize the issues in his life and deal with them accordingly.
- He knows the perfect order of his life: his relationship with God first, his family second, work and career third.
- The wife is the #1 priority after God.
- He takes care of business at home first.

9) He is honest in his commitments and devotes himself wholeheartedly to them.
- He will stick to his assignment not matter what.
- He garners the trust of his wife and family and the respect of the community because he follows through with his commitments.

10) He clears the path and leads his wife on the course of righteousness.
- The married man must strengthen his covenant with his wife to keep himself accountable to her by praying together, worshiping together, believing together, and remaining transparent in his struggles.
- A single Proverbs 31 man is honest about his intentions toward a potential wife and is steadfast in godly conduct.

11) He assumes the responsibility for covering his wife.
- He does not wait for her to proclaim her need, he is aware of it, he is drawn to them with a committed heart to fulfill those needs and he takes responsibility for shielding her from all she is vulnerable to in her uncovered state.
- He takes the responsibility of caring for her needs, protecting her, and ensuring her overall well-being, spiritually, emotionally, and physically.

12) He recognizes the needs of his wife as an opportunity to bless her.
- The man receives his covering from God and then he extends it to his wife.

13) He realizes that his word equals his life and makes the sacrifice needed to honor his vows.
- He perseveres through the hard times, finds a way to work things out, and sticks with the plan until he and his wife make it through the storm.
- It is a sin to make a promise and then break it.

14) He considers the cost of a commitment to the woman in his life and pays it.

15) He knows how to romance his woman.
- He knows how to make her feel special and courts her before and after marriage.
- He shares his heart and feelings with her.

16) He views the love he shares with his wife as a sacred gift to give and receive.

17) He embodies the nature of Christ.

18) He lives a life of unconditional love.

Now, all those points being stated, I am not so naïve as to think that a single man (other than Christ) will embody all of these qualities all of the time. And I believe that a wife is to help her husband in these areas, help him by loving him and supporting him. There’s so much more that I could write but there’s just not enough time.

That being said, there is another post on the way. I’ve been formulating it for awhile, but I want to do a bit more research before I post.